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October 10, 2006
Sad But Anxious
You know those days? The days that you remember something sad occuring on that particular day in years past? The days you tell yourself that you aren't going to be depressed about it this year, but you wake up that morning and can't seem to help it?
October 10th has always been one of those days. Not only did my best friend from elementary school leave us 16 years ago today... another close friend from high school would have been 33 years old today had she not left us 11 years ago next month.
It's not like I'm sitting at my desk bawling my eyes out, but there is just a somber mood in the air today. It took me over an hour to get to work today with all the rain and fog. At 9am it was so dark outside it looked like it was 12 hours later than it was. I am a true believer in the medical studies that say how much we really need the sun for our mental health. Last week, I don't remember seeing the sun much at all.
Monday night I didn't land at Dallas Love Field until after dark. Tuesday night I had class until 830pm. Wednesday I didn't leave work until nearly 9. Thursday, I skipped class, went home with a migraine that hasn't gone away yet and slept for a good 4 hours. I spent most of the weekend in my apartment studying for my 2nd calculus test that I have tonight.
It's supposed to start chilling off this week and I'm so ready for it. I've been wanting and craving soup. I want to make a big pot of soup and have dinner ready when I get home for a few days. I'm ready for Fall. I'm ready for true Football Weather. I'm ready for HALLOWEEN! I'm ready for BlogBlowoutBigD. I'm ready for my best friend and her husband to come up to BigD and visit in a couple of weeks. I'm ready to wake up on a Saturday morning and make a big cup of hot chocolate and have to take a blanket with me in order to sit on the porch. And mostly, I'm ready for a change.
I've finally found an apartment in a community that I feel safe living in, and that is finally feeling a little like home. I haven't truly felt like anywhere was HOME since I sold my house and left smalltown, TX (Houston outskirts) in June 2002. I've been doing some research at night and looking into other ways to change my current situation. I didn't see many prospects, but I'm going to keep looking.
If you live in the area and have any ideas to help me move towards a change, please let me know.
Posted by FutureFoodTVStar at October 10, 2006 12:13 PM
Comments
I used to live in Rowlett which has been growing. My sister lives in Sasche which is right outside of Garland. I actually like her area because it is far enough out and is still quiet and small but close enough to a shopping center like Firewheel and highways.
Posted by: Thao at October 10, 2006 06:06 PM
OK, I totally wanted to go back and read those links about your friends but it wouldn't let me (grrrrrrr)...can you send them to me?
the_kept_woman at yahoo dot com
Yeah, October is sucky for me too. Besides Tiffany another friend of mine died 10-19-1990...stupid hazing at university. Dumb, dumb, dumb.
Posted by: The Kept Woman at October 17, 2006 02:23 PM
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